Your cart is empty

Buy Dirty Stuff Now!
PayPal Acceptance Mark

Thank You Paul Walker!

Years ago I was on a really bad date at Billys in Newport Beach. I tried to drink enough to drown out the lame conversation I was submitting myself to.  It was hopeless until…

Paul Walker walked into the room. You could feel how every woman in the room stopped breathing for a second, then quietly sighed. He was with a girl and a child. I had seen a few famous people but none looked as gorgeous in person as they did on the screen. He did. He had that smile that lit up the room. You couldn’t help but stare.

He changed my life and doesn't even know it!

He changed my life and doesn’t even know it!

It didn’t look like they were romantically involved. They looked like maybe they were related or old friends. This helped make my date more tolerable. I don’t even think he noticed I was watching someone else. I remember Paul got up and walked past me, such a sexy stride, and went to the bathroom. I sat there and thought, “Should I go ask him for his autograph? Can I go and say hi?”.  I wanted to but I was afraid. Afraid of what, I have no idea. My stomach was doing little flips over what I was contemplating. Could I? Should I? Would I?

He returned to his seat and I did nothing. Not a thing. They continued talking, he paid the bill and they left. When he walked out every woman let out a loud gasp! The waitress went and rubbed the spot where he sat and we all looked at each other smiling because we knew what we were all thinking. Dirty girls!

My date continued to be a bore. I can’t even remember his name. I sat there and was thinking, “Why didn’t I go up to him and say anything? Why was I such a coward? He could have ended up liking me! We could have dated, maybe even had a relationship (I was a lot younger and naive). Why was I such a chicken shit?” I mean seriously, what is the worst thing that could have happened to me? He could say no. That’s it.. No. Could I survive that? Yes. Would I be hurt? Temporarily. Atleast I would have tried and it would be a hysterical story to tell my friends! Why are you so sad? I asked Paul Walker for his phone number and he turned me down. Seriously! That’s it. There I was sitting at this table, hating every minute of it. I was frustrated and bored and it hit me.

That was it! No more! No more chickening out. No more backing down. No more what ifs. From now on, I was going to go for it. Fear and insecurity was getting in my way. It was stupid. You only live once and what do you have to lose! Since that day I have always gone for it. I have never backed down. If I wanted to talk to someone, I did. If I wanted to meet someone, I walked up to them. It was time to quit daydreaming, no more regrets, just full throttle ahead. You know what happened? I have had some pretty fun and crazy experiences. When I’ve been out with friends and they are too scared or giddy to talk to someone, I did. I’ve partied backstage with Snoop. I’ve made jokes with Denzel. I’ve made Liv Tyler a little nervous. I think I annoyed Dana Carvey but laughed non-stop with Chris Farley’s brother. I’ve listened to stories about porn from Ron Jeremy. I’ve dated a drummer, did the trapeze at Santa Monica Pier, shot a gun and flown a plane. I’ve had sex on the hood of a car and a pool table (not on the same night). I’ve talked to a happily buzzed Robin Leach who was easily annoyed with LA plastic dimwitted women. I’ve drank beer with Tom Sneva and Tony Bettenhousen. Partied with the Detroit Red Wings and Edmonton Oilers. I’ve told Paul Stanley that he needs to smile more when we were taking pictures. Out of all of those, sex never occurred with anyone. Okay.. well one but that’s all. Just a lot of laughs. Yes.. I have had to run away from security once but I was really drunk that night so… Obviously, I am not with the band Journey. And you know what? I have had the best times ever! and I have zero regrets. Not one.

This is why I want to thank Paul Walker. He changed my life and made me a happier person. I am so thankful that Paul, if you ever read this, yes, I probably would sleep with you. Ya Right! For sure I would! Who wouldn’t!

You don’t have to be a rock star to live like one.

Such a glorious hunk of a man

Such a glorious hunk of a man

Only Fast over here.. no furious!

Only Fast over here.. no furious!

1 comment to Thank You Paul Walker!

Say Something Raunchy

  

  

  

You can use these HTML tags

<a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>