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By The Ass Girl, on April 10th, 2013
Favorite Phrase I Have Used This Month: I am ALL about customer service! Just talk to any of the men I have slept with.
It is my birthday month so I have taken a few days to come up with a theme. Too busy being self-absorbed in my increasing age, inability to continue to lose . . . → Read More: Nooners In November | Good Customer Service
By The Ass Girl, on April 9th, 2013
I know! I know! Orgasms? How predictable! Trust me, being the scorpio I am, I tried desperately to come up with something else. I did not want to make it easy. I am a stubborn, pain in the ass (when I’m not wearing my…) Wait! What was I saying? Oh yea, orgasms. I thought about . . . → Read More: 2 Condoms For My First Orgasm | Hitting Home Runs
By The Ass Girl, on April 10th, 2013
I have been sitting here trying to figure out a ‘J’ word to go with January. It’s really pissing me off. I have already used jack offs (although I do have a neverending list of stories under that catagory). I thought about “Juggs” or “Jauggernaughts” then I realized I’m not so sure how to spell . . . → Read More: Shipping Men With Small Penises To China | Improves Self Esteem
By The Ass Girl, on April 10th, 2013
Machismo.. Doesn’t that word just scream gold chain, hairy chest, the scent of Old Spice, white socks worn with sandals, speeding by you in an Iroc? Pretty hot huh?
NOT! It also screams arrogance to me and I hate arrogance. It also screams bushy hair to me and I’m not sure why but that leaves . . . → Read More: Myth #6: Machismo is Sexy-Hot
By The Ass Girl, on April 10th, 2013
One night (drinking) I was hanging with a gf..drinking some tequila(Jose’ I’m broke so the shitty stuff but tolerable in a one up kind of situation) we decided to go on Plenty of Fish and make a post. Not a usual post but a “Two For One Blue Plate Special”. IT WAS AWESOME! We . . . → Read More: Two For One Blue Plate Special | What Do Guys Really Want?
By The Ass Girl, on April 5th, 2013
Actually it came out of left field. A compliment from a friend, from back in the day, that made me smile. Yes, it wasn’t exactly roses & champagne, but when has that ever worked for me? NEVER! I’d rather hear reality. We caught up, had intelligent conversation, then discussed what we had in common over . . . → Read More: I can only rent because I have commitment issues
By The Ass Girl, on April 5th, 2013
Truth: NO! I mean hard is great but that whole fast thing..we have a word for you. You are the jackrabbit.
We don’t like the jackrabbit and our neck is sore for the next three days afterwards. How would you like it if I start slapping your dick around. Is that going to feel good? . . . → Read More: Myth #4: Nailing a girl hard and fast is great sex! Don’t Be A Jack Rabbit
By The Ass Girl, on April 5th, 2013
Okay.. Look.. I know! Where have I been? But we need to focus on something even more important. The mini men.. little penis guys. Now yes, I have mentioned my theory on sending them to another country and only allowing big penis men to pro-create. I can be a bit harsh at times but it . . . → Read More: March Mini Men | Yes We Are Talking Penis Size
By The Ass Girl, on March 26th, 2013
While at the Adult Novelty Expo in Vegas I received alot of requests to review products. Samples were being offered to me left and right. We all know I will try anything once and the idea of a breath spray to get your libido in overdrive? Well how could I not?? The only catch..I agreed . . . → Read More: Adult Novelty Expo
By The Ass Girl, on April 5th, 2013
I was pretty much 100% in favor of Fellatio this month! Although I think if you took a poll of the men out there they would definitely disagree. I pondered over how and what to say. I felt like if it was what everyone wanted to hear about, I had to give it a shot. . . . → Read More: February Fellatio | A Great Month For Oral Sex?
By The Ass Girl, on April 5th, 2013
Truth? No we don’t. We want men to be able to go multiple times in one night, hence the little boy phenomenon. In actuality, about 40 minutes into it, you have lost us. We are going over our grocery list, coming up with our things to do list, etc. It’s best to let it go, . . . → Read More: Myth #1: Women Want Men to Go All Night
By The Ass Girl, on April 5th, 2013
The Truth is it does!
As you know, I was not able to make Daytona so now I am aiming for Laughlin. Anybody have any extra room out there? Had a little car accident with an “asshole” that messed everything up! I have, however, been making my rounds and flashing my ass everywhere.
I LOVE . . . → Read More: Myth #2: Penis Size Doesn’t Matter | The Truth
By The Ass Girl, on April 11th, 2013
Morality? Gets in the way of fun? Nahh ! LOL. May cause a pause at times? Yea..probably. I scratch my brain and have more wine. I think morality is different for everyone. All I know is that the only person who can make you happy is yourself, so do whatever it is you want to . . . → Read More: Morality And Sleeping With Your Cousin
By The Ass Girl, on April 11th, 2013
MUCHOS GRACIAS!
There was no way I couldn’t take time out to thank those amazing people out there who helped out at the Ladies Who Ride ’12 and did it all free!
I love how in the world today, there are still so many wonderful people, who volunteered their time, for this event. AND did . . . → Read More: Ladies Who Ride ’12 | Photos
By The Ass Girl, on April 28th, 2013
One of my favorite things about the ANE/AVN is always the samples. I found this product pretty intriguing. The concept is good, bad tasting semen. This could be a problem for someone. They work like those breath strips. You peel the thin piece, place it on your tongue and it melts. Upon semen release it . . . → Read More: Semen taste yucky?
By The Ass Girl, on April 19th, 2013
White tank top with the words “I Can Dump The Man It’s The Dick I Have A Hard Time Leaving” written on the front. $19.95 . . . → Read More: I Can Dump The Man It’s The Dick I Have A Hard Time Leaving Tank Top
By The Ass Girl, on April 28th, 2013
I love discovering something that there is a genuine need for. The sort of product that you see and think, “Of course! Why didn’t I think of that?” Well, surprise! Someone else beat you to it. The creators of Luvena did.
I am not going to get into the medical stuff and research because it’s . . . → Read More: Sensitive Coochie?
By The Ass Girl, on May 7th, 2013
Hello Ass Girl,
I seem to have problems detecting when a girl wants to bump uglies with me. I am really shy, and can’t seem to pull the trigger. How do I know – what should I look for? or maybe I shouldn’t care?
Thanks, Michael from Denver
#RatedRaunchy
Dearest Michael,
First of all, . . . → Read More: How Do I Know When A Girl Wants To Bump Uglies?
By The Ass Girl, on May 15th, 2013
When you talk it makes it worse!
I have this friend right now who is currently in a dilemma. Why is that you ask? Well, because her boyfriend couldn’t keep his mouth shut.
I am not sure why it is but it seems men in lengthy and healthy relationships have to screw it up . . . → Read More: You Had Me.. Until You Opened Your Mouth
By The Ass Girl, on April 15th, 2013
Valentine’s Day got you worried? Not sure how you are going to pull it off with all those couples invites? I have the perfect solution! It’s a new service I started called “Dream Date For Hire”.
Our Current Dates Available For Hire:
Your Valentines Date
As you can see..we only hire professionals. We want . . . → Read More: Valentine’s Date 4 Hire
By The Ass Girl, on April 15th, 2013
I’m hoping everyone had a wonderful holiday and didn’t empty their xanax bottle (those babies can be hard to get). I’m still preparing for the AVN/ANE Expo in Vegas.
During my holiday I contemplated my goals for the New Year. I thought about making some changes..maybe it was time to try dating again. HUGE mistake! . . . → Read More: Your First Phone Call With A Girl | No Opinions Please!
By The Ass Girl, on April 11th, 2013
Absentmindedness? Not because I am late with my blog. That is too easy and we are talking about me! As you can see I have been on a couple excursions. All very fun ones. I will not allow anything else. Unfortunately, every time I began to write my blog…something kept knocking at my brains door.
. . . → Read More: How Do You Know If You are any Good at Oral?
By The Ass Girl, on April 11th, 2013
Sorry for the delay but I got wrapped up with watching this tv series about hookers and Jesus. Totally the truth! Only three episodes which was unfortunate but hey.. it was better than Gigilos. That show was horrible! Of course I already pretty much figured Jesus loved hookers. I mean, he loves everybody. I thought . . . → Read More: Scaring The Staff At The Viper Room | Jesus Loved Hookers
By The Ass Girl, on April 12th, 2013
BIRTHDAY CELEBRATIONS!!
It’s Friday night and I am sitting here daydreaming about living in my Barbie House. My kids, pets and my days of the week. Why am I calling it the Barbie House? Probably because when I was young I desperately wanted one. We couldn’t afford it so I would pack all of my . . . → Read More: From Barbie Houses to Stripper Poles
By The Ass Girl, on April 15th, 2013
PICK ME!! THINK TRAFFIC!
It’s Saturday night and I’m scrambling. I want to win this contest with Think Traffic. If you aren’t familiar with it, I will fill you in if I win, otherwise you’re on your own. They need me to write something about why I should win this Mentorship for a year. With . . . → Read More: Pick me!! Think Traffic! Handcuffs On Rear View Mirror
By The Ass Girl, on October 16th, 2013
Yep! Not big enough? Got it covered!
WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH YOU?
I know.. I know.. All you want to know is about the Sex Awards. I will be tackling that soon. What I can say is that I did learn a lot about fisting.. but today… today has thrown me . . . → Read More: It’s Just A Dick.. You Can Go & Buy One Down The Street! F^ck!
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