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What The Fuck 2012? How Do You Get Dick From Richard?

Titty Squish

WTF?

- Why is it okay to brake and let a woman cross in front of you but when you do it for a man, they get all weird about it. Almost embarrassed.

- An extremely large man riding a sportster (or scooter). Just doesn’t look right.

- How do you get the name Dick . . . → Read More: What The Fuck 2012? How Do You Get Dick From Richard?

Playing Supermodel in Parking Lot | Sunset Blvd.

Two Girls Smelling Pink Roses

Time for my Part 2,Saturday Night with my gfs. We decided to meet for a few drinks at a new place to start. One of those Sunset Blvd.places where there is no sign outside telling you the name of it, just a few high price sports cars strategically parked out front.We enjoyed a little gossip . . . → Read More: Playing Supermodel in Parking Lot | Sunset Blvd.

If I Can Drink A Beer And Suck Your Dick It’s Too Small Tank Top

If I Can Drink A Beer And Suck Your Dick It's Too Small Tank Top

White tank top with the words “If I Can Drink A Beer And Suck Your Dick It’s Too Small” printed on the front. $19.95 . . . → Read More: If I Can Drink A Beer And Suck Your Dick It’s Too Small Tank Top

Semen taste yucky?

Yumm?

One of my favorite things about the ANE/AVN is always the samples. I found this product pretty intriguing. The concept is good, bad tasting semen. This could be a problem for someone. They work like those breath strips. You peel the thin piece, place it on your tongue and it melts. Upon semen release it . . . → Read More: Semen taste yucky?

Scaring The Staff At The Viper Room | Jesus Loved Hookers

Viper Room

Sorry for the delay but I got wrapped up with watching this tv series about hookers and Jesus. Totally the truth! Only three episodes which was unfortunate but hey.. it was better than Gigilos. That show was horrible! Of course I already pretty much figured Jesus loved hookers. I mean, he loves everybody. I thought . . . → Read More: Scaring The Staff At The Viper Room | Jesus Loved Hookers

Soliciting You All | Booth for Next ANE/AVN Expo

It's Official

SELL!! SELL!!

I’M TRYING!!

Here I go.. It’s a another month and I’m still climbing that mountain. Mountain? Yes..that mountain to get to the top so I can get the pot of gold! Okay! Okay! I know that is supposed to be a rainbow but I live in California and it hardly ever rains. Could . . . → Read More: Soliciting You All | Booth for Next ANE/AVN Expo

Ladies Who Ride ’12 | Photos

Ladies Who Ride Event Poster

MUCHOS GRACIAS!

There was no way I couldn’t take time out to thank those amazing people out there who helped out at the Ladies Who Ride ’12 and did it all free!

I love how in the world today, there are still so many wonderful people, who volunteered their time, for this event. AND did . . . → Read More: Ladies Who Ride ’12 | Photos

Pole Dancing Country Style | Men and Women Work The Pole

Man Spanking Self in Chaps

Photo Mayhem – Meets the Stripper Pole A ho-down complete with chaps, stripper poles, and more.

[Show picture list] jQuery(document).ready(function(){ jQuery(“#ngg-slideshow-17-198-5″).nggSlideshow( {id: 17,fx:”fade”,width:320,height:240,domain: “http://theassgirl.com/”,timeout:10000}); });

Men Who Cry & Flirting Way To Front Row Of Def Leppard

Men Who Cry

My heat press is warming up. I still have a bunch of shirts I need to make for Sunday. I’ve been so busy trying to do everything and cover all of my bases that I haven’t even had a chance to go and buy myself more wine..in like a WEEK! I had a booth for . . . → Read More: Men Who Cry & Flirting Way To Front Row Of Def Leppard

The Basic Rules of Women

One of our favorite positions

Basic Rules of Women

I was watching the ending to “Liar, Liar”, where Jim Carrey is riding this stair cart trying to catch up with the plane his ex and son were on and I’m thinking, “This is EXACTLY why men and women have so many problems!”. Here is this sad situation and we . . . → Read More: The Basic Rules of Women

Hangover Cure – Party Pill

Party smart? Who wants to do that?

There I was at Sprouts getting ready to check out and I see it.. A pill for $1.99 that will help prevent a hangover. I have been looking for something like this all of my life. I really could have used it in my twenties (a couple years ago). For that price, I decided to . . . → Read More: Hangover Cure – Party Pill

Seriously? Is that your best line? I need a drink

Ass Girl Plates

Scene

A pretty girl is hanging out at a bar talking to the bartender, a female friend. The place is happening. There is loud rock music and the sun is shining. Not a cloud in the sky.

Guy

Hi. Can I get you a drink? I’m buying my friends a round. My name is….

Girl

. . . → Read More: Seriously? Is that your best line? I need a drink

Alcohol Makes Me A Nicer Person Tank Top

alcohol - Copy

Royal blue tank top with the words alcohol makes me a nicer person in black letters on the front for $19.95 . . . → Read More: Alcohol Makes Me A Nicer Person Tank Top

Smart Ass Shirt

Smart Ass - Copy

Grey t-shirt with the words Smart Ass on the front for $19.95 ea . . . → Read More: Smart Ass Shirt

Ladies Who Ride 2014! July 20, 2014

IMG_2016

BETTER LATE THAN NEVER!

A success filled with fun for a great cause! Annual event with our biggest crowd at Cooks Corner. Thank you to Nidess Dance Academy, Niko Marino; our amazing tattoo artist, Leticia of Just One Glance Photography, Tisha Stephens for doing hair & make up, . . . → Read More: Ladies Who Ride 2014! July 20, 2014

I’m Nobody’s Bitch Dog Shirt

Doggy - logo

Pink Doggy Shirt with the words I’m Nobody’s Bitch in red lettering $14.95

. . . → Read More: I’m Nobody’s Bitch Dog Shirt

Laying Around, Never! I’m Always Promoting

#RatedRaunchy

How hard do I promote my product? As much as I can! Feedback is very important to me and everyone loves freebies, so I put the two together. Camp Freddy coming up! My favorite event where I am able to assist by giving away shirts so that nobody ends up with nothing under the tree. . . . → Read More: Laying Around, Never! I’m Always Promoting

Blessing Of The Bikes May 4, 2014

Cooks Front

Come by and see TheAssGirl at our booth. Remember Vanessa loves JD and I love a cold Michelob Ultra! We have some fun surprises planned!

May 4, 2014

Chili Cook Off June 21, 2014

Cooks Corner Trabuco Canyon, CA

TheAssGirl will be there with a booth carrying products available for purchase! Come by, say hi and bring beer and JD!

June 21, 2014

Ladies Who Ride 2017

Ladies 2017

Make sure you click on A GLIMPSE for an amazing slideshow

To quote OCWeekly..On Aug. 20, somewhere in the neighborhood of 300 bikers turned up at Lifestyle Cycles, in Anaheim, and rode with the Lifestyle Cycles Riding Group to Cook’s Corner, in Trabuco Canyon, for the annual fundraiser for Breast Cancer Solutions. In addition to . . . → Read More: Ladies Who Ride 2017