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From Barbie Houses to Stripper Poles

Hot Stripper Play

BIRTHDAY CELEBRATIONS!!

It’s Friday night and I am sitting here daydreaming about living in my Barbie House. My kids, pets and my days of the week. Why am I calling it the Barbie House? Probably because when I was young I desperately wanted one. We couldn’t afford it so I would pack all of my . . . → Read More: From Barbie Houses to Stripper Poles

Falling For Gay Men | You Look Fabulous! I LOVE The Shoes!

Gay Men Love These Shoes!

I have been exposed to something I have never experienced before and I don’t know if I can come back from it, actually if I want to. I spent an evening with these phenomenal men. Let’s keep it simple(for the men reading this) and call them Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday and Saturday. It . . . → Read More: Falling For Gay Men | You Look Fabulous! I LOVE The Shoes!

Playing Supermodel in Parking Lot | Sunset Blvd.

Two Girls Smelling Pink Roses

Time for my Part 2,Saturday Night with my gfs. We decided to meet for a few drinks at a new place to start. One of those Sunset Blvd.places where there is no sign outside telling you the name of it, just a few high price sports cars strategically parked out front.We enjoyed a little gossip . . . → Read More: Playing Supermodel in Parking Lot | Sunset Blvd.

Turn Me 50 Shades of Grey | An S&M Perpective

Young Man And Cougar

This is my review of this book. Now please understand you do not have to agree with me, it is only my opinion. I am glad I waited a few days. My “hotter than hell” cousin came over to visit (before he goes back to NY BOOO!) and asked me about the book. I gave . . . → Read More: Turn Me 50 Shades of Grey | An S&M Perpective

Pick me!! Think Traffic! Handcuffs On Rear View Mirror

Flying

PICK ME!! THINK TRAFFIC!

It’s Saturday night and I’m scrambling. I want to win this contest with Think Traffic. If you aren’t familiar with it, I will fill you in if I win, otherwise you’re on your own. They need me to write something about why I should win this Mentorship for a year. With . . . → Read More: Pick me!! Think Traffic! Handcuffs On Rear View Mirror

MY FAVORITE THINGS OF 2012

Giving Finger

MY FAVORITE THINGS OF 2012

www.cookscorners.com No explanation necessary here. Everyone knows I love the place and the people. Nuff said. www.lolashoetique.com Almost every day a new pair of shoes. Great prices. It’s my bedtime story before I go to sleep. I just admire the pics and blissfully close my eyes. www.vendorgirl.com Biker Warehouse..I couldn’t . . . → Read More: MY FAVORITE THINGS OF 2012

What The Fuck 2012? How Do You Get Dick From Richard?

Titty Squish

WTF?

– Why is it okay to brake and let a woman cross in front of you but when you do it for a man, they get all weird about it. Almost embarrassed.

– An extremely large man riding a sportster (or scooter). Just doesn’t look right.

– How do you get the name Dick . . . → Read More: What The Fuck 2012? How Do You Get Dick From Richard?

Scaring The Staff At The Viper Room | Jesus Loved Hookers

Viper Room

Sorry for the delay but I got wrapped up with watching this tv series about hookers and Jesus. Totally the truth! Only three episodes which was unfortunate but hey.. it was better than Gigilos. That show was horrible! Of course I already pretty much figured Jesus loved hookers. I mean, he loves everybody. I thought . . . → Read More: Scaring The Staff At The Viper Room | Jesus Loved Hookers

Pole Dancing Country Style | Men and Women Work The Pole

Man Spanking Self in Chaps

Photo Mayhem – Meets the Stripper Pole A ho-down complete with chaps, stripper poles, and more.

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Ladies Who Ride ’12 | Photos

Ladies Who Ride Event Poster

MUCHOS GRACIAS!

There was no way I couldn’t take time out to thank those amazing people out there who helped out at the Ladies Who Ride ’12 and did it all free!

I love how in the world today, there are still so many wonderful people, who volunteered their time, for this event. AND did . . . → Read More: Ladies Who Ride ’12 | Photos

Men Who Cry & Flirting Way To Front Row Of Def Leppard

Men Who Cry

My heat press is warming up. I still have a bunch of shirts I need to make for Sunday. I’ve been so busy trying to do everything and cover all of my bases that I haven’t even had a chance to go and buy myself more wine..in like a WEEK! I had a booth for . . . → Read More: Men Who Cry & Flirting Way To Front Row Of Def Leppard

How Do You Know If You are any Good at Oral?

Loverboy Concert

Absentmindedness? Not because I am late with my blog. That is too easy and we are talking about me! As you can see I have been on a couple excursions. All very fun ones. I will not allow anything else. Unfortunately, every time I began to write my blog…something kept knocking at my brains door.

. . . → Read More: How Do You Know If You are any Good at Oral?

Soliciting You All | Booth for Next ANE/AVN Expo

It's Official

SELL!! SELL!!

I’M TRYING!!

Here I go.. It’s a another month and I’m still climbing that mountain. Mountain? Yes..that mountain to get to the top so I can get the pot of gold! Okay! Okay! I know that is supposed to be a rainbow but I live in California and it hardly ever rains. Could . . . → Read More: Soliciting You All | Booth for Next ANE/AVN Expo

The Joys Of Autism | Mom Look What I Can Do!

Bankrupt Films Water Bottle

What am I up to now you ask? A couple people I care about have recently found out their child has autism. They have a long, stressful road ahead of them but I want them to know that there may be some unexpected surprises along the way.

THE JOYS OF AUTISM

When my oldest was . . . → Read More: The Joys Of Autism | Mom Look What I Can Do!

Your First Phone Call With A Girl | No Opinions Please!

Love Naked Men Who Dont Talk Panties

I’m hoping everyone had a wonderful holiday and didn’t empty their xanax bottle (those babies can be hard to get). I’m still preparing for the AVN/ANE Expo in Vegas.

During my holiday I contemplated my goals for the New Year. I thought about making some changes..maybe it was time to try dating again. HUGE mistake! . . . → Read More: Your First Phone Call With A Girl | No Opinions Please!

Valentine’s Date 4 Hire

Your Valentines Date

Valentine’s Day got you worried? Not sure how you are going to pull it off with all those couples invites? I have the perfect solution! It’s a new service I started called “Dream Date For Hire”.

Our Current Dates Available For Hire:

Your Valentines Date

As you can see..we only hire professionals. We want . . . → Read More: Valentine’s Date 4 Hire

Swat Fuel

Swat Fuel.. Everything you need to get the best workout

I was at the Lauren Powers Classic at Cooks Corner and met this very informed man who was selling Swat Fuel. He gave me a bottle for free and asked me to try it out. He also gave me a tank and cute shorts . . . → Read More: Swat Fuel

Transformation 2013!

There is nothing in this post on sex so men, you may want to go to another post.

You only live once. That’s my motto to live by so I like to try everything once. I have a great friend who is a Physician Associate in Aesthetic Medicine. I overheard her asking our mutual friend . . . → Read More: Transformation 2013!

PRIDE Lubricant

Lubricant for the Cause by Nature Labs LLC

 

When I was at the ANE/AVN Expo this year, I loved checking out all the products and wanted one of everything. One of the things in particular I wanted to explore were the products geared towards gay men. It seems like most of the websites . . . → Read More: PRIDE Lubricant

It’s Just A Dick.. You Can Go & Buy One Down The Street! F^ck!

Yep! Not big enough? Got it covered!

WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON WITH YOU?

I know.. I know.. All you want to know is about the Sex Awards. I will be tackling that soon. What I can say is that I did learn a lot about fisting.. but today… today has thrown me . . . → Read More: It’s Just A Dick.. You Can Go & Buy One Down The Street! F^ck!

AVN / ANE Expo 2014 in Las Vegas! Booth 1712!

I am going big this year. Everyone has seen me at this event, handing out freebies, promoting, drinking, dancing, promoting, drinking… It was time for the big leap. This year TheAssGirl will have a booth and be selling product in The Joint. I started with a table but a booth became available so I grabbed . . . → Read More: AVN / ANE Expo 2014 in Las Vegas! Booth 1712!

Laying Around, Never! I’m Always Promoting

How hard do I promote my product? As much as I can! Feedback is very important to me and everyone loves freebies, so I put the two together. Camp Freddy coming up! My favorite event where I am able to assist by giving away shirts so that nobody ends up with nothing under the tree. . . . → Read More: Laying Around, Never! I’m Always Promoting

How High Should I Jump by R. Milton Quibner

Author of How High Should I Jump

Take a look at this man in the picture. Who do you think he is? Surgeon? Professor? Retired? What do you think he likes to do in his free time? Sail? Golf? Strip Clubs? One of the things in life I would love to do is eliminate . . . → Read More: How High Should I Jump by R. Milton Quibner

Hangover Cure – Party Pill

There I was at Sprouts getting ready to check out and I see it.. A pill for $1.99 that will help prevent a hangover. I have been looking for something like this all of my life. I really could have used it in my twenties (a couple years ago). For that price, I decided to . . . → Read More: Hangover Cure – Party Pill

Sensitive Coochie?

I love discovering something that there is a genuine need for. The sort of product that you see and think, “Of course! Why didn’t I think of that?” Well, surprise! Someone else beat you to it. The creators of Luvena did.

I am not going to get into the medical stuff and research because it’s . . . → Read More: Sensitive Coochie?

Faster Than A Horny Man? | How About My Car!

Hot Wings Panties

I know! There is nothing faster but you are wrong! Can I just say this is going to sound crazy at first but it really isn’t.

So this is the deal… My car has been driving by itself. I swear! It sounds impossible and at first I couldn’t believe it, nor could anyone I . . . → Read More: Faster Than A Horny Man? | How About My Car!

The Dildo Dr.

There I was driving to Vegas when I see this truck. I laugh hysterically and snap a picture. Imagine, my car with TheAssGirl magnets driving beside a truck with The Dildo Dr. on it. It doesn’t get much better than that!

Talking to the Dildo Dr. was much more informative than you would think. I . . . → Read More: The Dildo Dr.

How Do I Know When A Girl Wants To Bump Uglies?

Hello Ass Girl,

I seem to have problems detecting when a girl wants to bump uglies with me. I am really shy, and can’t seem to pull the trigger. How do I know – what should I look for? or maybe I shouldn’t care?

Thanks, Michael from Denver

#RatedRaunchy

Dearest Michael,

First of all, . . . → Read More: How Do I Know When A Girl Wants To Bump Uglies?

You Had Me.. Until You Opened Your Mouth

When you talk it makes it worse!

I have this friend right now who is currently in a dilemma. Why is that you ask? Well, because her boyfriend couldn’t keep his mouth shut.

I am not sure why it is but it seems men in lengthy and healthy relationships have to screw it up . . . → Read More: You Had Me.. Until You Opened Your Mouth

Ladies First! Where Are Your Manners!

Friends Forever

There is something that female friendships can bring to your life that no other can. Why is that? Why can’t a man fill that void? If you say you have one that does, you are wrong. I am not sure if it’s the idea that they can really identify with anything you . . . → Read More: Ladies First! Where Are Your Manners!